I’m jumping forward to the future again to let you in on some big news on the travel front. Before we headed off to adventures in Southern Laos without internet, we bought our return ticket home.
Because I’m all about sharing the reality of travel – the good and the bad – let me explain how that came to be. It took us a while to admit it, but somewhere in the last few months of endless buses, boats, lukewarm showers, hard beds, temples and cafes, we both started feeling a little burnt out and bored. I know it is a hard thing to imagine – how could someone feel anything but ecstatic on a “trip of a lifetime” – but it is true. And it happens to the best of them.
I can think of many possible explanations. Maybe it was because we got waylaid involuntarily in several towns in a row. It is one thing to decide to stay put and relax; it is another to be ready to move on but being stymied for one reason or another.
Maybe it was because one or the other of us was sick off and on for weeks.
Maybe it was post-India let down. India was invigorating precisely because it was challenging. Anything Southeast Asia could throw at us paled in comparison and seemed like a nagging bother instead of a cultural challenge.
Maybe it was because until recently, we’ve been mostly moving along Southeast Asia’s tourist trail. It is all too easy to go through the motions of travel and end up in the same places, surrounded by other Westerners doing the same things and eating the same comfort foods.
Maybe it is because getting off the tourist trail seemed like more work than we felt like exerting by this point in the trip.
Maybe it was because on some level, we are homesick and some part of us wants to be eating the comfort foods instead of more noodles and rice.
Maybe it was because the trip was rapidly winding down, and neither of us is any closer to figuring out what we want to do with the rest of our lives.
Maybe it was because we let the extraordinary become ordinary.
Maybe it was just because we’d been away from home for nine whole months.
In reality, I suspect that it was some combination of all of these things.
So, naturally, we did what any burnt-out traveler would do…we decided to extend the trip. Makes perfect sense, right?
As we waited for me to recover from a stomach ailment in Vientiane, we found ourselves scheming. One great part about Laos was traveling for a bit with our new German friends. Hearing about their upcoming plans to head to New Zealand, we found ourselves searching for flights and researching costs of campervans. We realized part of the reason we were feeling a little blah was the thought that Southeast Asia could be it for our trip. Our dwindling funds and time meant that we easily could finish out our time in Southeast Asia, in countries that may be unique but that are more alike than they are different.
So, one day – kinda like how this whole trip started in the first place – we just did it. We bought a ticket from Malaysia to New Zealand. Sure, there was much deliberation first. Sure, we probably are just procrastinating returning to the real world. Sure, we’re going to dip into our savings to finance the extension. But, you know what? Suddenly, we’re excited again. About everything. About spending more time in Southeast Asia to see most of what we want to see at a slow pace. About going to New Zealand. About getting our own wheels again. About having a firm return date home.
The truth is, I think the open-endedness of the end of the trip was making us flail around a bit. There are tons of lifestyle redesign proponents out there advocating traveling without time restraints or plans. I’m continually fascinated by the growing chorus of interesting people designing ways to travel indefinitely and encouraging others to do so. I think that’s great, and if there is one thing I learned from our travels is that I need to create the lifestyle I want rather than just do what I’m supposed to do. But the thing is, creating the lifestyle I want involves going home. We’re both too big of homebodies to travel forever. I like Pittsburgh. I like having a home. I know that I want travel to be part of my life, but I don’t want travel to be my life.
So while I haven’t had any grand epiphanies about what I want to do with my life – just small revelations that I haven’t quite worked into a coherent whole – as of May 13, 2011, 408 days after leaving Pittsburgh, I’ll have to work on creating the life I want at home. And I’m okay with that. Especially since between now and then, I have a lot to look forward to. Instead of only spending a week or so in Laos as we originally planned, we only had days to go on our 30 day visa when we crossed the border to Cambodia yesterday. We’ll spend a couple of weeks in Cambodia (famous last words!), including watching the Steelers play in the AFC championship game at the crack of dawn on Monday, then cross over into Vietnam to be in Saigon in time for the Steelers to win their seventh Super Bowl. : ) We plan to be in Vietnam for three to four weeks in total, and we’ll fly from Hanoi back to Bangkok in late February/very early March. We hopefully will be meeting up for a little bit with a friend of mine from high school who has been working on her own travel plans. We’ll head south through the Thai islands, and do a quick jaunt in Malaysia as we make our way to Kuala Lumpur for our April 3 flight to Christchurch. We’ll tour New Zealand by campervan for a month in April (when the flights and campervans are cheaper as it turns to the shoulder season), and then head home – but not before making a week-long stop in Hawaii first. As it turns out, flying from Auckland to Honolulu and from Kauai to Pittsburgh was slightly cheaper than just flying straight home from New Zealand. Which is awesome, especially since we missed Kauai on our honeymoon. As opposed to our big pimping honeymoon splurges, we’ll attempt frugality in Hawaii this time (unless the Hotel Hana-Maui wants to put us up for free, of course. Love that place). As far as re-entries to the United States go, I can’t think of a better way than to visit state number 50. I can taste the pineapple already.
So that’s our plans in a nutshell. Hope you’ll join us for the rest of the ride, as well the rest of the highlights and lowlights from our travels in Thailand, round one, and Laos. Teasers of what’s to come: elephants, elephants and more elephants; the slooooooooow boat to Laos; why foreign massages aren’t always what they’re cracked up to be; and Sean and Amy do Laos on two wheels. Thanks for reading along!
Sometimes it’s hard to manage what is best for ourselves within the noise of what we’re ‘supposed’ to feel or do. Long term travel is an amorphous beast that people try to define and understand but, in reality, we have to listen to ourselves and try to figure it all out later. I can relate to all you have said and am trying to figure it out still…a year later! Enjoy the rest of your journey! Cheers!
I think you are homesick for Steelers! I wish you were going to be here for Sunday’s game, but I’ll cheer along with you from across the world.
Miss You!
I’ll keep reading.
Ashley and I toured around New Zealand for a month in 2007. We hit the other side of the shoulder season, November-December. Amazing place, I really enjoyed the camping and Great Walks.
And the tomatoes. Mmmm, fried New Zealand tomatoes.
Glad you’ll be going someplace tropical to finish off your trip…sounds like a nice way to end it. Your blog has just been amazing and I look forward to living it vicariously through you. Miss you guys!
I loved this post. I really appreciated your honesty, and having been in a similar place, I could totally relate. We felt very much the same in Asia–having to fight hard to register the differences between places rather than feeling that everything was “same same.” I still haven’t decided if that was simply because Asia didn’t interest us as much as S. America and Africa or because it was the end of the trip and we were just plain tired. I think it was probably a combination of the two. I think it’s great that you’ve added New Zealand to the itinerary. It sounds like it revitalized you. Enjoy the rest of your travels.
I just cried reading this Amy! You have such a wonderful outlook and way with words!
Thanks for your kind words everyone! I really appreciate everyone reading along about our journey.
Hey! I stumbled upon you guys through Hedgehogs Without Borders, and remembered connecting with you before… perhaps about Bulungula?? BUT! I’ve spent the past 30 minutes reading about your recent adventures, and this post totally hit home for two main reasons. One, our lack of return date was a big source of struggle for me. Once we had bought it, even though it was a few months out, I instantly felt calmer, and more grounded. And two, we bought it when we were in Laos, also (mostly) due to the exhausting tourist track of SE Asia. The effort didn’t out weigh the benefits, and we weren’t comfortable/were too tired/scared/whatever to go far off that track. So off to NZ we went from Bangkok: a city that I surely enjoyed 100x more after visiting Hanoi for 10 days. Who would of thought I would find Bangkok quiet and soothing?? Best of luck to your travels! And I have to admit: when you’re ready to come home, home is ready for you. Our readjustment has been much smoother than I anticipated. I think we were both just so ready for it.
Blair – hello again! I think it was Bulungula; I’m pretty sure I found your blog when I was researching around back then. It is nice to hear that I am not alone and other people also don’t find this travel thing to be puppies and rainbows all of the time. It is weird; right now, if we didn’t extend our travels, we’d be heading home in 2 weeks instead of heading to a new continent. I’m glad to hear that readjustment wasn’t too bad; I’m excited to go home but a little nervous. p.s. I loved Bangkok both times and didn’t see why everyone else thinks it is so hectic. I’m sure a big part was the first time we were coming after a month in India, the second time after a month in Vietnam.